You guys, I'm out of balance. Almost every aspect of my life right now is somehow out of whack.
Let's see, last time I checked in was, I think, shortly after my assistant quit. From that point up until (and including) now, my ass has been firmly planted under the recycled tire mulch on the work side of the work/life seesaw. To be perfectly honest I'm typing this at 7:18 pm on Sunday of Memorial Day weekend and I originally sat down at the computer to remote in to my work desktop to do a spreadsheet for The Day Job. That will still need to be done, but for blog sake I just need a couple of minutes to write. I miss you guys!!
So when my assistant unceremoniously deserted me, I started to work way too much. I'd like to say that I'm one of these people who always makes time to work out, no matter what (they do exist, I know a few), but sadly I am not. When I have to work all day, come home and make (ok defrost) dinner, then clock in to second shift from my kitchen table, I know full well that I would feel better if I would just get up an hour earlier in the morning to lift weights....but that friggin' snooze button has a hold over me that is more powerful than that which is wielded by ice cream, margaritas or even Channing Tatum's abs.
So when I started working too much I almost completely stopped working out.
I have a normally well controlled back problem. There are two forces pulling at my back at any given time....stress is trying to pull it out of whack, and exercise is trying to keep it...well...in whack. It doesn't take tons of exercise to keep the problem in check. Just consistency and a variety of cardio, weights and yoga.
Well take the extra work, add in some almost comically ill-timed misbehavior by The Boy, take away the healing forces of weight lifting and wham....I'm walkin' funny and it's not for a good reason.
This, of course, means twice weekly trips to the chiropractor...trips I have neither the time nor the money for. Which means more stress.
So you know how they say exercise boosts your immune system? Turns out they're not just saying that to hear their jaws flap.
Sneezing and coughing is even less fun than normal when your back is out, and a sinus infection is extra fun to get over when you're working 12 hours a day.
But at least I have my nutrition plan. Abs are made in the kitchen yaknow.
Yeah, I crack me up.
When dinner is a break between 8 hours in the office and the 4 hours you need to put in from home before you can pass out and do it all over again, frozen pizza will win out over a salad almost every time, especially when it hurts to stand, walk and bend.
I'm here to tell you, it's a slippery slope from convincing yourself that it's ok to switch out the 55 minute workout for the 20 minute one to eating chocolate peanut butter no-bake cookies for breakfast. A steep, slippery slope indeed. It's coated with butter and there is a brick wall at the bottom.
So I've been surviving on a diet of Shakeology, Amoxicillin (and ladies, we know what that brings with it don't we?...yeah, that too), DayQuil and whatever quick, easy, calorie-laden item happens to land within my gravitational pull.
There is a definite balance to being healthy. I see it as a 90 degree angle, sort of a wall and a floor. I have a friend who is anorexic and a compulsive exerciser. She is leaning...no...PUSHING hard against the wall. It is not easy by any stretch, but she doesn't have to maintain any sort of balance. She just keeps pushing against that wall (yaknow, until it buckles and she ends up hospitalized but that's another story). The other extreme is the person who eats whatever they want and never exercises. That person is laying on the cold, hard floor. Sure it's easy, but you're not really living down there. It's hard as hell to get up and it starts to hurt after a while.
I need to find a way to stand close to the wall, without leaning or pushing on it.
On June 16th I start The Ultimate Reset. While I am definitely going to work on getting off the floor between now and then, the real balancing act begins on that day, and I'm hoping to become good enough at walking that tightrope that when I reach the end I will be able to maintain my balance on a narrow path. Hopefully getting my diet in check, kicking the caffeine and sugar addiction and getting the toxins out of my body will be the start to getting the rest of my body and life in balance.
Today's dinner (I don't want to talk about lunch). This awesome salad, with Bolthouse Farms Blue Cheese Yogurt dressing. Not bad.
Now...that spreadsheet isn't going to do itself.