What makes me want to write?

I started writing on an almost daily basis about seven or eight years ago.  I was a member of a diet website which offered a "Journal" option.  I hadn't kept any sort of diary since I was a pre-teen but I was desperate to lose weight and if the site administrators thought writing about it would help, I was ready to give it a shot.

It was an extremely friendly community and before I knew it I had readers!  People commented on and regularly followed what I had to say.  Some said that I had a way with words and when I failed to write they sent me messages asking when I'd write again.  It was AMAZING. 

I continued to write (and lose weight) there for a couple of years but when it got to the point where I was only logging on to this weight loss site to write I decided a change of venue was called for.

So I took my show on the road to LiveJournal.  A dozen or so of my friends from the diet website followed me , and there I continued to write for my own entertainment and that of my cyber-friends.  Only a handfull of people who I had ever met in person had access, and those were people who I had met and developed in-person relationshios through the diet website.  Nobody in my "real life", nobody whose relationship with me didn't spring from my writing was allowed in.  Somehow it's easier to share your deepest personal thoughts and problems with people you almost never have to see face.  There is no judging and talking about you behind your back.  Or if there is, you never have to find out.

It could be a sign that I'm growing up (at 45? yathink?) or maybe that my life is calming down but I find that I don't have that much to write about in my journal anymore.  My personal life is fairly calm and mostly happy.  My challenges just don't scream to be written down as they used to.  But I still have an overwhelming urge to write.  It's frustrating having the need to write, yet to have nothing to write about.  It's like being hungry and there's nothing good in the house to eat.  It's bang my head on the desk frustrating I tellya!

Last week we went to see the movie Country Strong.  Watching movies about music usually makes me want to sing, which is equally frustrating because I have NO vocal talent whatsoever.  But this movie, maybe because it also dealt with the writing aspect of it, made me want to write.  It made me want to write SONGS.  But considering that I don't play an instrument and I don't read music, if I did write a song I couldn't share it with anyone because I sing like a drowning cat.

So here I am.  Back at my computer screen wondering why I'm compelled to do this day in and day out.  I certainly don't want to write about writing over and over again. 

But hey...I changed my background.  Isn't it cute? 

Today's Lunch - Tomato soup with crackers and grapes.  All that was missing was the grilled cheese, but we can't have everything.